YOU’RE NOT ALONE: Choosing To Love Those Who Treat Us Badly

What happens when you come across someone implicitly rude, so indifferent in character, and just plain ill-mannered, someone who stands in the middle of extremes, far too demeaning and philanthropic by nature, but wedges closer to the former? Reasonably in essence, tendency is, we react just as spitefully but more so aggravatingly; we act in revenge, possibly holding our chins up, rolling our eyes, darting belittling stares, assessing the narrative's antagonist from head to toe, showing them who's boss, who's superior, who's presence should've been exalted, all from which the very principle of "do unto others what you want others to do unto you" comes forth. We've ingrained a kind of mindset that tolerates a vengeful attitude in response to defending ourselves; we tell, much so convince, ourselves, "Well, she started it, she was being disrespectful first. I have every right to act just as disrespectful because I'm only defending myself." It's normal to act that way, everybody does it, BUT WE'RE NOT CALLED TO BE NORMAL, WE'RE NOT PLACED IN THIS WORLD TO BE LIKE EVERYBODY ELSE. WE'RE CATALYSTS FOR CHANGE, WE'RE HERE TO BE DIFFERENT, WE'RE HERE TO MAKE A CHANGE. And loving the unlovable is that change.

And it's not easy, saying a compliment to a restaurant server who deliberately ignores your request is not easy, believing the best in a friend who backstabs you is not easy, smiling at a cab driver who's been giving you death stares for overtaking is not easy. In fact, loving the unlovable might just be one of the toughest, if not the toughest, languages of love, but you know what? Greatness isn't easy, selflessness isn't easy. If it were, then everybody who ever lived was and would be great.

Short story: we have this house help that's insanely prudent, she wears the same monotonous frown day after day, she rudely refuses to help me when I ask her to (note: i ask her politely and with a smile), she screams at me when I get the room all messy, and to say it bluntly, she's disrespectful, she's unnerving and temperamental. Her coworkers even went to the extents of quitting in order to avoid anymore unnecessary conflict and unwanted stress. And to be honest, there were times when I wanted to fight back, and there were times when I did (HEHEHE! I'm not proud of it), but one day, I decided, emphasis on decided, to love her. More than feelings, loving is a choice; a choice to be patient, to be kind, to be gentle, to understand even when your feelings are telling you otherwise. I say sorry when I don't want to, I give her things that remind me of her and things of necessity to her, I often treat her with ice cream or soda, I made it a point to hug her everyday and tell her "LABYUUUUU" in the most "malambing" way; and eventually she started opening up to me, and only later did I realize that so many problems have been weighing her down, causing her to act the way she does. She has her own battles to fight and being hostile is her way of self defense. And if you think about it, almost all people showcasing a negative attitude roots down to the same cause. Anyway, from that moment on, she started to laugh at my jokes, she's become vulnerable, more open, and she's truly become a part of the family 🙂

To end, here's an excerpt from Joyce Meyer's devotional messages,
"If someone knows full well she has done us wrong, and we return her evil with good, it begins to tear down the walls she has built around herself. Sooner or later she will begin to trust us and start learning from us what real love is."


One Reply to “YOU’RE NOT ALONE: Choosing To Love Those Who Treat Us Badly”

  1. And I realize that we shouldn’t be pressure to follow the bandwagon, especially us teenagers, it requires a lot of effort and patience before you get there. Love the post <3 Nagkaroon din ako ng experience ng ganito and sometime I became the revenge typer but then I will be guilty of it and then I realize it is BAD guys it's BAD 🙁

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